Archive for the 'Uncategorized' Category


I want one of these. Coffee at work sucks!


Feel the knit

It’s no secret I’ve been going through a rough patch recently, and the problem with this rough patch is that while I wish it’d go away, it can’t and it affects my mood, my reactions… and my knitting.

I’ve always been a bit of a procrastiknitter, in the sense that I will grab a new project fiercely, knit it until I’m almost done and lose interest. This wasn’t the issue in the past weeks.

Last night, as someone gave me an unexpected token of friendship in the shape of a loaned spindle and a bunch of yummy fibre, I realized I need to get out of the patch.

I’ve been contemplating whether I need help. I feel like I’ve been carrying a load on my shoulders that can’t be shifted and when last week a friend caught me after a meeting and looked me straight in the eyes and asked “what’s wrong with you”, I broke down. I find it odd that I always used to break down with my mum. And now I can’t because she’s part of the load I carry. Can’t go to dad. He’s part of the load I carry.

Work is suffering because of this. I get given brilliant reviews when I am seriously doing nothing. This whole week I think I’ve put in around 10 hours of productive time, I feel like I don’t give a crap about what’s in my tray and because of my head, I can’t concentrate. Rather not do work than perform badly.

I need a break. Yet I can’t afford the time out, given that at home everything is so fragile, I need to save up days to ensure I can leave whenever I need to. And I’m tired. So tired. Part of the reason I couldn’t knit is that I am so exhausted my mind goes into static signals when I hit the train in the afternoon.

The one thing I found out thanks to this whole thing is that I am a good actress. I can always crack a joke and bring out the fun half of me, just because I hate breaking down in front of people.

While I don’t quite know the way out of the patch, I know last night I felt the knit. Got to the thumb gusset on my glove. Step by step, procrastiknitter.

For some good news at the end of the week – Whitesnake are the Very Special Guests at this year’s Download. Tune your chords…. “Here I go again on my ooooown….”


Follow me to the edge of twitter.


1 person made me happy today. She gave me brownies.

2 people made me mad yesterday. I should let that be bygones, but for some reason, I can’t.

Continue reading ‘People….’

I can’t type

But who’d blame me? I’ve been looking at a spreadsheet with acronyms all afternoon. The letter D doesn’t look like anything anymore. Does that ever happen to anyone? Looking at something for so long that the edges become fuzzy and it seems like a made up letter and not a real one?

Never mind. My point is, I just tried to log on to my email, and the internet kept spitting me out saying “no user with that name”. WHAT?

Oh wait. stelatheshoe is DEFINITELY not me. Coffee. Must. Have.

The way you park your car

The philosopher in me identified a life metaphor this morning while I looked outside the window of a meeting room. I could see the rows and rows of cars, some battered, some new, some flashy, some old trusty rusty machines, and I thought:

They are all parked differently. Some people will get to work in the morning, find a parking space and just ram the car in it, straight or not, and off they go. Some will take the time to find the space where they can put the car in reverse and enter the space backwards, then straighten the wheels and exit. The first will have to do the hard work of reversing to exit after a hard day of work. The others will simply slide off their space and be on the road.

I am going to have to change my way of parking my mind before work, because this morning as frustration hammered my head (trains delayed, my tights are falling, the laptop is heavy, I am hungry) I almost frayed at the edges and shed a tear.

I hope changing my parking ways changes everything, because I’ve been here before and I don’t want to have to take drugs to be in the frame of mind that regular happy people are in.

And some more!!

Hey you – what did you do this afternoon? I did this:

From Forest And Frill

I finished the whole body section of Forest & Frill by Stephanie Dosen (available for purchase on Ravelry) in just one afternoon! I double stranded Rowan Soft Lux in a lovely forest green, et voila… Almost ready to prance, it just needs the crochet edge!